If your parents don't know yet how did they make it clear that they won't be there for you? Don't worry hun as long as the baby's father is by your side you'll be ok. As soon as that baby comes out your parents may have a change of heartI'm 17 %26amp; pregnant, my parents have made it clear they won't be there for me when I have my baby, any advice?
I'm pretty sure your going to be fine. Once they see that baby they will forget all the pain they felt that you got pregnant at such an early age and realize that they are grandparents and they will love that baby no matter what.
My suggestion is to put the baby up for adoption. Both you and the baby will have a better life if you do, in my opinion.
why should they support your decission to have a child
it is your life
think about it, they had you, take care of you, and send you to college now that you will turn 18 they are expecting a wedding at least something for them to brag about
no matter how wonderful a grand child will be but if they are strick they will want it after a wedding but here you are
having a baby and to make thing more perfect you just assume that they will not be supportive but of crouse your b/f parents are, well guess what you are not their little girl, it is not their son that could die givign birth, it is not their son that
will have to miss school to take care of the child first months
it is not their son that might end up holding the bag because b/f decides a baby was to much
So girl give your parents soem respect and talk to them
tell them that you are sorry if you dessapoint them
and you will understand if they need sometime to forgive you but not only do you need them in your life the baby also will be needing them
and you hope that they will be their when the baby is born
Good luck %26amp; take care
You're 17. You are not ready to raise a child no matter how mature you think you are.
You are going to look back on this decision 10 years from now and know that you weren't ready. You may not openly regret it, but your lamenting your missed opportunities will cause you to resent your child eventually. Its human nature and can't be denied no matter how superior you may think your mental strength is.
Your parents know this and know what the right decision is in this case and were pushing you to this decision because they love you. If you want to be ungrateful to them and throw their love out the window, you deserve nothing less than to be removed from their lives.
Don't worry so much. A lot of parents say that in hopes that it will scare you and hope that you do not get pregnant. They may be disappointed when you first tell them. But they love you and they will be there for you. Just pray and put it into God's Hands. Good Luck!!
I'm so sorry for what you are going through...i'm very glad you have your bf's family to lean on. my guess is your parents will come around...they just need time to adjust. the best thing you can do is tell them and then back off and go about your life. they will be upset for a while but after they cool off they will see how well you are doing for yourself and your baby and will want to be a part of their grandchilds life.
In due time, your parents will accept your pregnancy. And when the baby arrives, they will fall in love with their grandchild.
You will have to tell them first before you make any assumptions about whether they will be there for you or not. If they said that to you in the past, they were probably trying to scare you from getting pregnant. A lot of young mothers expect their parents to raise their children, so maybe they were worried that the burden of raising the child would fall on them.
But if you and your boyfriend step up and take the bulk of the responsibility, I'm sure your parents and his parents will all help with the rest. Just be careful of how much you ask of them. You don't want to burn out your resources.
Try your best to continue your college education. Getting a college degree (AA or any other degree) will increase your earning potential and that added income will make raising your child a lot easier.
Best wishes!
Just be the best mom you can be even during pregnancy. Include your parents in everything involved with the pregnancy and baby and show them how mature you are by not ignoring them. I think eventually they will become excited and want to be involved. Give them pics from the ultrasound, invite them to the babyshower, ask your mom for pregnancy/baby advice, ask her to go shopping for the baby with you. I am sure they will love the idea once they have time to accept it. Good luck.
Dont worry! even though u probably want your parents there for you , you still have you boyfriend and his family! you also have your friends! think about it ! you have alot of suport still and your parents still love you they just wanted your live to be their way. my parents said that if i ever got pregnant under age then they would disown me bu i am 9 months pregnant and they just found out yesterday! they said they sill loved me but they want nothing to do with me! i thought who care what they think! i still have my bith dad and his family! ( my parents are divorced and remarried) i also have my friends and my boyfriend!. i have alot of support and so do u!
i know that it hurts when your family doesn't support you but at least you have your BF's family to support you. its better then having nothing at all. i think that your family will come around once they see that baby, or they see an ultrasound photo. you know its a big shock to a parent to know that someone got there little girl pregnant and it will take them a little while to adjust but i think that they will come around and it will all work out for you.
you are old enough to support yourself. The choice is yours. I truly believe once your parents see that darling baby they will melt like butter and completely change their minds and if not hey it's there lose.
How do you know that they wont be there for you if you havent even told them yet....just tell them and if they dont want to support you then dont go to them....go to your bf's family for support...you dont need negative influences in your life when you are pregnant....Good Luck
Tell your parents. They may have said they would disown you to try to deter you from getting pregnant. But given that you ARE pregnant now, their opinion may change.
your an adult now tell your parents that. since you don't live with them don't worry about them at all. tell them that it is sad that they will not know your baby and that you feel sad for them being so immature and non supportive of what you are doing. tell them that you are not asking for them to support your baby or help you out financially that you only wish them to be a part of you and the babies lives. good luck and congrats! oh and as for the abortion papers they don't matter anymore because you are an adult now and they can't force you to do anything.
My parents also dis-owned me when they found out that I was pregnant. My mother still calls me every once in a while to see how I am, but I have not heard from my father in about 5yrs. It is good that you are still in college - do NOT drop out. Are you working at all? If so, see if you can apply for a part-time job. As far as getting help, there is always the gov't. First, the father needs to be on Child Support the minute the baby is born. It's his, he's responsible. Also, try to apply for WIC, possibly Food Stamp Benefits, and Medicaid (if you don't already have insurance). I was 17 when my son was born and I had all 3 of those from the gov't + the father. Don't not feel bad that your family is not supporting you. It only makes you stronger and they are the ones who are going to miss out. Keep your head up and stay strong! Everything will work out for the better, trust.
They were just trying to scare you. A lot of parents do that.
As long as you have one side of the baby's family supporting you, it should be alright.
keep it. your parents need to understand your wishes.
stick with your BF and his family.
good luck.
Same thing happened to me at that age. I am now 23, married, graduated with a bachelor's degree, and planning children of my own. I placed my little girl for adoption, and her parents couldn't be happier. It's the hardest thing to do, and I know you were set on keeping your baby. But all I can say is at least think about it. It isn't just your life; it's your babies life. And everyone else that you know is also involved. Best of luck!
Your parents may not be fond of the thought of you being a mom right now or threw out your entire pregnancy... as hard as it may be, wait until after they actually hold the baby to hold what they say. My cousins now wife, when she got pregnant her parents did everything from trying to take her to court to try and have an abortion... to taking her to court to try and get custody of her baby... they were not happy at all... the day my cousins daughter was born both grandma and grandpa fell in love with her. Give it some time... they'll come around.
If your parents do not know how can you be sure how they will react? I admire your resolve to keep your baby and if your boyfriend and his family are supportive then at least you are not alone. I say inform your parents of the situation and the decision you have made. They may surprise you. If not be strong and believe in yourself. You sound very mature and obviously are prepared to stand up for your child. What a fantastic mum you will make!! Good luck
Hi,
I'm in the same position I can understand and relate. I'm here if you need to talk you can email me marilyn31402@yahoo.com. God bless and stay strong.
If you are 18 (almost) and not living with your parents, then this is your choice and it is only their loss if they decide not to be proud grandparents. You are definately old enough to make your own decisions and support yourself, especially if your boyfriends family will be helping you.
It might be different this time because you are obviously older and can support yourself. Were you living with them the first time you got pregnant? Maybe they did not want to help you (support and take care of the baby) which was your mistake. Or are they religious and don't believe you should have a child without being married?
The main reason why they would not approve now (and did not approve before) is that you are young and obviously not responsible. I can understand a slip up once, but twice? You need to get on some sort of birth control, and if you can't afford it, then go to planned parenthood! That's what you should have done after the first pregnancy.....
If your parents are good people, they may be hard on you at first, but they will love and want to see your child no matter what. If they don't come around and still don't consider you in the family, maybe you're better off without them.
Your family will more than likely be upset because you are still in school, not married, etc. I am glad you have some support. Just remember that you haven't told them yet and when you do you should sound like you guys are both very happy and at first there may be a blow up- but pretty soon they will want to be there for you and baby. if not-I am really sorry.
they will come around! it is still early!
Stand on your own to feet, be brave.
You said yourself you have your boyfriend and his family to support you, DO NOT get rid of this baby just because of your parents, only do it if its what you honestly want, its your choice!
Chances are when they see their grandson/daughter they will come round to the idea.
Stay Strong, Good Luck x
Someone needs to be blunt and honest with you about this and what has happened. All you young ladies think your so smart and know everything there is to know about life. You are always claiming its my body I can do what I want. OK, then you made your bed here, go lay in it. You got pregnant, out of wedlock, irresponsibly, and your parents don't want to have anything to do with you any more because of it. Should have thought about that before you made your mistake.
It is commendable that you are not considering abortion as an option. I'm not sure if I'd recommend marrying the father or not. You have three options, as I see it:
1) Raise the baby yourself, and/or with the father
2) Have the father and/or his parent's raise the baby
3) Give the baby up for adoption
Its sad to hear that a family would turn its back on such a blessing. Oh the other side of it, you do have your Boyfriends family who is there for you. This child you are carrying is part theirs too!
Your parents are the ones who are going to be missing out on the child and its life.
Are you sure that's how they feel, you did state that they don't know yet. You'd be surprised that they might eat their words. Children are a blessing not a curse!
Sometimes parents say things they don't mean, more as an incentive to keep you from doing things. If they don't know yet, give them a chance. Tell them, let them rant and rave and be idiots for a little while, then after they have calmed down and realize how much they love you, sit down and talk rationally about this and see if it isn't a lot different than what you think right now.
I know I have said things to my kids when they were growing up that I meant at the moment, but when they were in trouble it completely changed and I would do anything to help them.
Give them a chance to come around. They probably will. Just don't get into a mad screaming fit with them when you first tell them. Go to them and if they start yelling, sit quietly, even if you want to talk back, and act like an adult and let them make total fools of themselves, and after they are done, and you have acted mature, let them apologize to you for their behavior! Great tactic...always got to me as a parent! Oh, and cry a little too...that breaks a parents heart.
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